Archive for June, 2006

Why do people like to talk bad about you behind your back? If she doesn’t like what I have been doing, can’t she just be honest and tell me straight on my face? I don’t like what happened to me yesterday. I think I had the worst time of my life. What made it even worse is that the people who listened to her blaming me for all the mistakes are my good friends. And she knows it. Maybe she had everything planned out – so that these people would actually tell me and that I would finally know it and then she’d be happy because I will feel so lousy. But one of my closest friend told me that she was actually trying to cover up all her shortcomings (a lot of things did not get done despite the fact that I have informed her in the meeting 2 weeks ago).

Nevertheless It was just so depressing. I cried – and each of my three good friends really understood what I was going through. Of course, my other half supported me and encouraged me, so I felt okay.. finally.

But last night, before going to bed, I reflected again on what had happened. I cried for so long. I never thought this would happen to me. I wished I knew what to do. Do I just ignore what had happened? Do I pretend that nothing happened? Should I show her that I knew that she had been bad-mouthing me?

This morning, she came to my office to get some documents from another colleague of mine. I had the intention to say hello to her, but then, she just walked straight past me! That was the point of time when I felt the worst! But I ignored what I felt, went right to her and asked if everything was alright. Stupid, wasn’t I?

But then.. Rasulullah experienced worse than what I went through today and he still showed good behaviour to his enemies. I should follow the Sunnah, shouldn’t I? She still would need my help since she was the one who took over my place!

Allah.. please give me strength.. show me the right path… guide me…………..

I should be stronger, and wiser, and less emotional at work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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I took one day off from work yesterday and had a really good break (although I still have another 29 days leave until the end of the year). I wish I knew how I can finish up all these vacation days. Even getting one day off a week is difficult – what more for a whole month!

Alas.. when I got to work this morning, I was faced with a number of issues. It wasn’t related to my current post, but my previous post. The auditors are coming in tomorrow, and a lot of documentation have not been prepared. We had a meeting about this earlier on the 7th of June but I guess they didn’t realize the kind of work that is involved to ensure everything runs smoothly. But I can only watch. I better keep my mouth shut and stop making nasty remarks about why things don’t get done!

I received quite a number of belated birthday wishes today. I feel so much older!

By the way, I have added
Ahmed into my list of favourite blogs. Check his webpage out!

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I turned 32 today. Scary. And I decided to change the look of my blog to make it look pinkish (makes me feel younger.. hehe). This morning, my twins wished me… “Hepi Berday mama” (after their dad taught them) so that really made my day. As I am writing my blog now (it is 3.52 pm) the younger twin had just walked out of the room. :).

So, happy birthday to me. May the coming days make me a better person – an obedient servant of Allah, a loving daughter to my parents, a loving wife to my husband, a caring mother to my twins, and a trustworthy employee of my organization!!

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A Two-Month Break

Hmm.. Exactly two month since my last posting. I wanted to write, in fact there were so many things I wanted to talk about.. but I just couldn’t. My life was in a turmoil for the past two months. The excitement of the new job and a new boss, the sadness of leaving the previous job, the death of a dear friend.. sometimes I felt as if there was too much to handle..

But Allah is great.. I am still standing strong. I am getting used to my new job and, I still spend some time to help my previous department.

My husband has been extremely supportive.. and my darling daughters have been understanding, especially when mama has to work late nights!

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